{"product_id":"retirement-t-shirt-eye-chart","title":"Funny Retirement T Shirt-Can You See Retirement? Take the Eye Chart Tee","description":"\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAt first glance, this funny retirement T-shirt looks like a routine trip to the optometrist. Put on your spectacles and look closer. The eye chart spells it out, line by line, getting harder to deny the lower you read: P-E-N-S-I-O-N... N-O-T... F-O-U-N-D.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWe ran every test. No reversing eye drops are going to fix this blurriness. Your retirement may be out of focus, but at least the shirt is soft, sharp, and easy on the eyes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFull disclosure: We wear these ourselves — pre-wash and post-wash — to make sure nothing about the quality needs a stronger prescription. Because if we're going to put \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePENSION NOT FOUND\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e on someone's chest, the fit and feel better be 20\/20 quality.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis is the perfect wearable vision test for anyone whose 401(k) needs a much stronger prescription. Or for anyone who's ever stared at their retirement statement long enough to wonder whether the problem is their eyesight or the balance.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBold hand-lettered typography, a classic eye-chart layout complete with red and green guide lines, and a punchline that gets clearer the longer you stare at it — this turns real financial anxiety into a groan-worthy optical illusion. A natural favorite for optometrists, ophthalmologists, glasses wearers, eye-care professionals, or anyone whose retirement plan is currently testing somewhere around \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e20\/200\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRetirement is supposed to be something you can see on the horizon. Instead, \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eyour pension appears to have a blind spot.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eProduct features\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003e100% ring-spun US cotton — soft, pre-shrunk heavyweight (6.1 oz)\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eGarment-dyed finish for a soft color and lived-in texture\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTubular knit without side seams for a clean, comfortable drape\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDouble-needle stitching on all seams for long-lasting durability\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSizes S–2XL available; sewn-in label for comfort\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMachine wash cold (max 30°C\/90°F)\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDo not bleach\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTumble dry low\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIron, steam or dry on low heat\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDo not dry clean\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e10% of every purchase is donated to Feeding America — because nobody should go without dinner while they wait for their retirement numbers to come into focus. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/teamfeed.feedingamerica.org\/participants\/Team-Pension-Dept\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSupport the campaign →\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Bay \/ S","offer_id":48890283229416,"sku":"17525342996951828446","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ S","offer_id":48890283262184,"sku":"25629260194205368790","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ M","offer_id":48890283294952,"sku":"29443123079155249502","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ M","offer_id":48890283327720,"sku":"19276888645688388281","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":48890283360488,"sku":"62616280194764461120","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ L","offer_id":48890283393256,"sku":"10644563349069390640","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ L","offer_id":48890283426024,"sku":"74918162657373107344","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ L","offer_id":48890283458792,"sku":"55113872882326196644","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":48890283491560,"sku":"33123190988135592368","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ XL","offer_id":48890283524328,"sku":"19655810200823255504","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ XL","offer_id":48890283557096,"sku":"78809863246883293552","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ XL","offer_id":48890283589864,"sku":"32635716214978302529","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":48890283622632,"sku":"22915443017266046096","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Bay \/ 2XL","offer_id":48890283655400,"sku":"89310252136892703306","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Grey \/ 2XL","offer_id":48890283688168,"sku":"12261714286923183869","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 2XL","offer_id":48890283720936,"sku":"12078761328883199321","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ivory \/ 3XL","offer_id":48890283753704,"sku":"59366992424658878322","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":48890283786472,"sku":"76774299295195483677","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0795\/6584\/8808\/files\/4365641398692597364_2048.jpg?v=1787619074","url":"https:\/\/retirementanxiety.shop\/products\/retirement-t-shirt-eye-chart","provider":"Retirement Anxiety","version":"1.0","type":"link"}